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Resentment is Old News - Time for a Reset

Resentment is Old News - Time for a Reset

Reclaim your joy and shed the weight of resentment. Learn how to free yourself from resentful thoughts now.

Sol TV
September 14, 2023

This Newsletter at a Glance:

✨ How Much Resentment Is Normal?

📖 TL/DR: What Is Chronic Resentment?

🦋 Sol Bites: 3 Steps to Release Resentment

🎬 Video Bite: Omanisa Ross on Resolving Resentment

🌟 Words of Wisdom

Fun fact: Everyone experiences feelings of resentment once in a while. It’s completely normal and not a sign there’s something wrong with you. It doesn’t even necessarily mean you need to make major changes to your thinking.

However, if you constantly feel resentful, that’s a different story. If that’s the case—or you want to learn why it can be harmful—read on…

📖 TL/DR: What Is Chronic Resentment?

While occasional resentment is a natural part of the human experience, persistently hanging on to resentment can harm your personal growth, happiness, and the health of your relationships.

When resentment becomes chronic, it suggests an underlying issue needs to be addressed. It might indicate you have unmet needs, unresolved conflicts, or unequal power dynamics within relationships. Additionally, chronic resentment can stem from suppressed emotions, unexpressed boundaries, or a lack of assertiveness in communicating your needs and desires.

It’s important to recognize that chronic resentment should not be ignored or brushed aside. It can fester and intensify over time, potentially leading to further emotional turmoil and strain in your relationships.

🦋 Sol Bites: 3 Steps to Release Resentment

If you think you might harbor some lingering resentment, here’s how to face it—and let it go.

Take responsibility. Resentment actually isn’t about what happens to you or what other people do—it comes from how you think about those things. It may result from you reliving events and focusing on how you were humiliated or wronged.

It might be a sign that you haven’t set boundaries and you’re worrying about disappointing people. If you can own up to the fact that resentment is your reaction to something, you can release the feeling.

Assess its purpose. If you consistently resent something or someone, it means you have mental thought patterns that are maintaining it—habits stick around because they fulfill a purpose. Ask yourself: Why am I stuck in this resentment-inducing pattern of thinking?

For instance, if you do three shots of alcohol before a work party because of social anxiety, do the shots make you feel less resentful about having to be there? To stop needing those shots, you have to find a healthier alternative to fulfill that need.

Questions to ask yourself about a particular resentment: Does it give you a false sense of certainty or control? Does the feeling gratify my ego by portraying me as a victim or better than someone else? Or does it simply occupy my mind with something secure and familiar? To overcome resentment, it is important to identify the underlying need the thought pattern fulfills and find a more productive way to address that need.

Find out what you’re avoiding. Ultimately, resentment is a sign of procrastination. Is it distracting you from your goals, dreams, or other desires that may overwhelm or scare you? Do you find yourself dwelling on events in the past when you were wronged in order to distract yourself from current anxiety about assertively expressing your desires to your friend, partner, or boss?

Remember, resentment grounds you in your past and can distract you from future aspirations. To break free from the resentment trap, reflect on the feeling, address it, and then let it go.

🎬 Video Bite

Clean anger is like a bright red flame focused on the present moment. It is a powerful emotion that can motivate us to take action and make things right.

Resentment is like a sickly green fog focused on the past. It is a toxic emotion that can linger for a long time and poison our relationships and our lives. It is often rooted in fear, insecurity, and a sense of injustice.

Click here to watch Sol TV Creator, Omanisa Ross draw a beautiful line between clean anger and resentment, shedding light on understanding and resolving resentment.