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- The 3-Part Willpower Secret: How to Finally Achieve Your Goals
The 3-Part Willpower Secret: How to Finally Achieve Your Goals
27% of Americans cite a lack of willpower as their biggest obstacle to change. But there is a way to break free.
Sol TV
January 28, 2025
The idea of willpower is something many people misunderstand. It is often considered a fixed trait—something you either have or don't—and it’s time we move past this old-fashioned idea. In reality, willpower waxes and wanes. You can sense its strength when you're feeling capable and motivated. Dips, meanwhile, aren't hard to miss. Most people can relate to these low-willpower moments: hitting snooze and being late for work, ordering takeout because you didn't meal prep, or scrolling through social media instead of doing laundry. When willpower weakens, procrastination tends to creep in, making even small tasks difficult.
Instead of judging yourself during low-willpower moments, understand that they're natural. The key to getting through them is to recognize this natural cycle and use your high-willpower phases to plan and prepare for when your inner strength inevitably wanes. In other words, when you’re feeling motivated, set out your clothes for the next day, prep your meals for the week, or set a time limit on your social media usage. By strategically using high-willpower moments, you'll work with your natural rhythm, which will help you overcome procrastination and achieve your goals, even when your motivation is low.
If willpower isn't a fixed trait and fluctuates, what is it, really?
At its core, willpower is the conscious alignment of your actions with your long-term goals, even when faced with alluring, immediate temptations. It’s the ability to say “no” to instant gratification and “yes” to make choices that serve your future self, one decision at a time.
This means that willpower is about understanding yourself, your patterns, and your goals deeply enough to make choices that support them. It's a skill you can cultivate, and the first step to improving it is understanding what undermines it.
1) Understand Why You Self-Sabotage
It's easy to blame the lure of apps and online sales for why you get distracted from your intended goals. But let's be honest: Those are just excuses. Most of the time, our bad habits are ways of coping with something inside—stress, boredom, loneliness, or just avoiding something that feels hard. So, what's your trigger? What thought or feeling makes you reach for what you know you shouldn't? The sooner you own up to your internal triggers, the sooner you can find legit ways to deal with them that don't involve self-sabotage.
2) Align With Your Future Self
There's always a dilemma between the Present Self (who wants instant gratification) and the Future Self (who has big plans). We often identify more strongly with immediate desires and can feel like we're missing out if we don't indulge them. You need to start consciously aligning yourself with your best, most fulfilled self.
The next time you're tempted to stray from your goals, visualize the person you aspire to be—the one who has achieved your goals and is proud of where you are. Ask yourself: What would my best self do right now? By consistently making choices aligned with your vision, willpower becomes less of a struggle and more of a natural expression of who you are.
3) Use Willpower to Build Habits, Then Let Habits Do the Heavy Lifting
Instead of trying to overhaul everything at once, pick one habit to improve at a time. Initially, you'll need willpower to practice this new behavior consistently. In the long run, you want to be able to rely on habits rather than fleeting motivation to drive your accomplishments.
Think of willpower as the initial push to establish a new habit. Establishing a new routine takes effort, but the more you use willpower to reinforce it, the stronger the new habit becomes.
One powerful strategy is to build habits sequentially, anchoring a new one onto an existing one—a trick called habit stacking. This makes new habits easier to perform. For example, if you want to begin meditating daily, you could link it to your morning routine and always meditate right after you brush your teeth. That creates a natural cue and simplifies the integration of the new habit.
So give it a shot! Embrace your internal rhythms and apply these strategies to cultivate your willpower. Remember, it's intertwined with emotional resilience—the capacity that allows you to grow through challenges and create the life you truly desire.
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We love you,
Mona & The Sol TV Team ❤️
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