There's no universal way to deal with personal fears, but there is a shortcut that can help you figure out what exactly you're really afraid of.

Psychologists believe a majority of our basic fears fall into three categories:

1. Helplessness

2. Uncertainty

3. Loneliness

If you dig deeper and get past your surface-level fears, they almost always boil down to one of those three issues:

You're scared to face your lack of control (helplessness).

You're terrified of not knowing what's gonna happen next (uncertainty).

You're scared of being alone or disconnected from others (loneliness)

TL/DR: Confront the Big 3

If you want to get ahead of your fears, the first thing you need to do is to watch for feelings of helplessness, uncertainty and loneliness showing up in your life.

Whenever you feel scared or notice yourself constantly worrying, or seeking reassurance, or hanging out with people you don’t particularly like, ask yourself:

• Is there something more to this? Are helplessness, uncertainty, or loneliness lurking behind the scenes?

It takes time and guts to uncover the truth, but once you start noticing this pattern within your fears, you can't really unsee it.

Sol Bites: 3 Questions to Unlock Your Deepest Desires

The three deep fears—helplessness, uncertainty, and loneliness—are ones that all of us have, and none of us ever will completely rid our lives of them. So once you become more aware that they exist, what do you do?

Rather than looking at fears as weaknesses, use these revelatory moments as opportunities as windows into your deepest desires.

• Fear of helplessness might be a sign that you desire power or independence.

• Fear of uncertainty could be related to your desire for knowledge or control.

• Fear of loneliness might be pointing to your desire for connection or love.

Instead of trying to eliminate fears, a better approach is to ask yourself:

1. What do these fears actually represent? 

2. What do I really want deep down? 

3. How does understanding my fears get me closer to clarifying my values?

Instead of seeing your deep fears as something negative, think of them as indicators leading to a better understanding of yourself.

Your deepest fears aren't things holding you back—they're teachers showing you what you truly want in life.

Video Bite

How do you let go of fear and anxiety? Try Sol TV Creator Shira Lazar’s tips to feel peaceful and free once again.

Words of Wisdom

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We love you,
Mona & The Sol TV Team ❤️