This Newsletter at a Glance:

✨ Psychological Reasons Why We Take Things Personally

🔑 TL/DR: 4 Reasons Why Things May Bother You

🌟 Sol Bites: 4 Habits to Stop Thinking Everything Is About You

📹 Video Bite: Brene Brown on Criticism

💭 Words of Wisdom

You’re a social perfectionist. 

Do you freak out about people seeing your flaws or mistakes? Social perfectionists feel intense pressure to be perfect in everyone's eyes and are constantly stressed about how they’re being perceived by others. When you feel that way, you can't help but take things super personally.

You tell yourself stories.

People who take things personally are good at spinning narratives about what their haters think and say. For example, if you don’t get invited to a party, you immediately assume that your friend was intentional about it, causing you to feel hurt and angry. Those feelings don’t come from being left out, though—they come from the stories or the thoughts you’ve told yourself about the incident.

You spend too much time with the wrong people.

If you're surrounded by haters, users, or disrespectful people, that negativity will seep into your life, and you’ll eventually treat yourself the same way.

Negative self-talk is your motivator.

Many of us are stuck in the trap of thinking that pushing ourselves super hard will make us successful. Unfortunately, research shows that being harsh and judging yourself diminishes your performance. And what’s worse, this habit of self-scolding can turn into an endless cycle of talking down to yourself, which brings on anxiety and low self-confidence, which results in you taking everything super personally.

Be okay with your worries.

This is a must for social perfectionists. Although the self-help industry has brainwashed us into thinking we shouldn’t care what anyone thinks, it’s 100% natural to do so. If you don’t want other people's opinions to ruin your day, the trick is you have to change your focus. Rather than stressing about what others may think of you, just remind yourself that being a little worried about it is normal. You'll be blown away by how much easier it is to get on with your life.

Get real.

If you’re always making up stories in your head, strive to be mindful of what you’re telling yourself. Level up your mindset so it’s more realistic—or ditch the storytelling altogether. It’s a hard habit to break, but with practice and patience, you’ll improve.

Surround yourself with more positive people.

Ditching critical friends, ending toxic relationships, or putting boundaries on caustic family members isn’t easy, but it will be worth it.

Speak to yourself with love. 

It’s tough to break the habit of tearing yourself down and viewing mistakes as character flaws. However, you’ll feel freer when you ditch the "I must be super harsh on myself to do well" mindset. Breaking this habit is about noticing your emotions without beating yourself up about them. Treat yourself with kindness, just as you would treat a best friend. 

Don't take anything personally. Nothing others do is because of you. What others say and do is a projection of their own reality, their own dream. When you are immune to the opinions and actions of others, you won't be the victim of needless suffering.