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Your Grumpiness Guide

Your Grumpiness Guide

Feeling grumpy lately? 😒 We get it. Let's get to the bottom of why + 4 pro tips to kiss grumpiness goodbye. 👋

Sol TV
September 28, 2023

This Newsletter at a Glance:

☹️ What Is Grumpiness?

✨ TL/DR: What Causes Grumpiness?

🍬 Sol Bites: 4 Steps to Get Good at Dealing With Grumpiness

🎬 Video Bite: Romina Kwong on Grumpiness

🖋️ Words of Wisdom

Professionals in the fields of psychology and mental health tend to overlook the concept of grumpiness. It’s a universally experienced feeling, yet there is a lack of helpful information about how to understand it and manage it.

Grumpiness is generally perceived as a negative mood that doesn’t necessarily have a cause that you can pinpoint. When you’re grumpy you may feel annoyed, irritable, or frustrated, but it can also encompass sadness, anxiety, guilt, or other emotions.

✨ TL/DR: What Causes Grumpiness?

When it comes to grumpiness, there are two types of people: those who are occasionally grumpy (all of us) and 2) chronic grumps.

If you’re dealing with a temporary bad mood and you’re trying to pinpoint the cause, start with HALT: Are you hungry, angry, lonely, and/or tired? (By the way, if you’re in a state of HALT, it’s not a good time to make important decisions.)

If HALT is not your issue, then the cause could be a case of unmet needs (perhaps your partner is oblivious to your need to discuss a problem); negative self-talk (you’re overly self-critical and have a harsh inner dialogue on replay); or unrealistic expectations (old, outdated, and high expectations can lead you to Surlyville Station).

Grumpiness becomes chronic when you have a recurring mental talk track related to the issues above.

We should all expect to experience occasional episodes of grumpiness, so the objective shouldn't be to avoid it completely (which is impossible) but rather to reduce and handle its impact.

🍬 Sol Bites: 4 Steps to Get Good at Dealing With Grumpiness

🤔 Acknowledge it.

All this entails is saying to yourself, "I feel grumpy." The biggest mistake with any emotion is denying the feeling or ignoring it. Just face the feeling and label it for what it is.

👍 Validate it.

Say to yourself, "It's okay to feel grumpy even though I don't like this feeling." No matter how bad it feels, nothing is wrong with it–you aren't flawed, lacking determination, or a bad person.

🔍 Get curious about it.

Be an emotional detective and think about what you were doing or thinking about before your grumpiness started. Learning to examine your feelings in a non-judgmental way may help you move through them faster.

👊 Bring it on.

As with any emotion, fighting grumpiness will make it more intense and last longer. So the last step of this process is to tell yourself, "I can move forward despite how I feel." This is you training your brain to understand that grumpiness is not a threat, and it doesn't need to derail your day (or week, or more)

🎬 Video Bite

Feeling grumpy and frustrated lately? It's ok, we all have those days. Take a deep breath and remember you have the power to shift your state. Sol TV Creator Romina Kwong is dropping some knowledge to help us flip the script on frustration.

Her S.T.O.P. method is a game changer:

S - Stop what you're doing. T - Take a step back and breathe. O - Observe your thoughts and feelings with box breathing. P - Proceed mindfully with compassion. Let this simple DBT method help you overcome frustration and tap into inner peace.